Her Broken Mechanical Heart

She dropped the wrench on the ground. She was so flustered these days that she couldn’t even fix this simple hover bot she had been working on. A project that usually took her 2 days was now headed into a week and a half and the owner was threatening to take his business elsewhere. To the mechanic cyborg down the street. And that was just the problem.

That stubborn, mechanical, shiny and sexy cyborg. He was part machine, part human. Mostly machine but his face was still ruggedly handsome, and his smirk made her mechanical heart skip a beat. She was becoming defective, she needed a new upgrade. She shouldn’t be feeling this way. There was nothing in her programming that would constitute what was going on. Her heart was thumping along much faster than the metal wires should have allowed. Her brain components were going haywire. And her usually perfect bionic sight went all hazy when she was near him.

Both of them being mechanics she was near him quite often. They worked in a small village and they were constantly competing for clients and for work. She worked her mechanical butt off trying to out work him and get more business…at least, that’s how it used to be. Until she fell in love with him. Now she wasn’t focused, was taking longer to work on her projects and was losing customers to him. And he had no idea. He couldn’t feel emotion. Up until 3 months ago, she hadn’t been able to either. But something had snapped in her. Had short circuited. Now she was feeling things forbidden to her kind and having thoughts that would make her creator keel over. And that wasn’t even the worst. The worst was the dreams.

Every night when plugged in to charge up the dreams came. Dreams of them together working, out on walks, in bed…thoughts that couldn’t come true because of basic anatomy but that didn’t stop her mind from wandering. And lately the human part of her that was left seemed to being forcing it’s dominance on the rest of her. If she didn’t get fixed soon she would be doomed to a life of loneliness, and, no income.

She decided to go see the cyborg doctor in the morning, as she gave up, again, on her hover bot project.

*************************************************************************************

Hey everyone! That’s everything! I hope you liked it and please let me know if you want to hear more. I might definitely write more. This is an idea i’ve been toying around with for a while and I would love to flesh it out a bit!

Again thank you everyone for sticking with me and I definitely plan to be writing more in the future than I have been!

Goodnight,

Crystal

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Return from an unplanned hiatus

Hey everyone!

I know it’s been a couple months since I’ve written anything on here and I just want to apologize for that. I moved in with my boyfriend and his sister about two months ago and the original plan was that right after we got internet set up in the new house I would start writing again.

Well with it being an older house some things came up with the plumbing and insulation and stuff and with getting all of that fixed and now getting ready for the Christmas season it’s all been a bit overwhelming while also getting used to an overnight shift.

I appreciate everyone’s understanding and promise I will  be writing on here more from now on. Hopefully later tonight I can write a longer piece, maybe something fiction and get back on the ball. I am back on my thyroid medicine after neglecting to take it for a while and am feeling a bit better. Thank you everyone again for the continued support. I was blown awhile when I realized that not only had I not lost all my followers,  but there were still people checking my blog even though I hadn’t written in months. This gave me an overwhelming sense of hope and support and I can’t thank you enough!

Love, Plutorawr (aka-Crystal)

Hey everyone!

How’s everyone doing today?

I hope everyone is getting along well and having success with their blogging.

I did a post a while ago about my top 3 songs at the moment and it was pretty popular so I thought I’d do another one like that.

Before we get into it I want to say a huge thank you to TheBlogComplainer who posted my poem on his site. Please go check him out!

Another quick note: I am hoping to be moved into the new place by the 22nd and I work everyday until the 21st so I will try to blog as often as I can but I might not be able to regularly.

With all that stated here we go!

My first current favorite song is Throne by Bring Me The Horizon.

This actually isn’t a band I listen to very often but I have been listening to this particular song a lot lately and I love the beat and I especially love the lyrics as well. Even if you don’t normally listen to that kind of music I definitely recommend it and it’s actually the song I’m listening to as I write this. (And how I just realized I need a new headset)

 

The second song that I have been listening to a lot is an old favorite and I’m not actually crazy about the verses but I absolutely love the chorus and that’s Gravity by Papa Roach. I’m not a huge rap fan and I wish the verses weren’t so screamy but I still love the song.

 

The last song is quite different from the other two since it’s a country song and it’s actually a pretty sad song but it’s been prompted by seeing someone I haven’t seen in a very very long time and I have had it stuck in my head for about a week now and that’s Mine Would Be You by Blake Shelton

 

I hope you guys liked this post and if there’s any other certain kinds of post you would like me to do let me know! Also feel free to share with your other blogger friends and I would be glad to let someone guest blog on one of my posts if you’d like!

Thanks again for all the support!

Cold Feet?

Hey everyone!

How is everyone? So I know it’s been a while but I have been working on moving lately and it’s been hectic with packing and work and my boyfriend’s grandmother is up for vacation.

I’ve been feeling kinda hesitant lately though and I’m not sure whether that’s normal or not. I’m moving in with my boyfriend and his sister and I’m getting a big case of nerves. I’ve lived with my parents for 25 years now and it’s going to be a big change from what I’m used to.

I suppose I’m also kinda worried that once we’re living together we might come across issues that we haven’t before and I’m worried if we can overcome them or not.

If you have read my blog before you know that I have anxiety and this could just be caused from nerves and from the unreasonable anxiety I get sometimes.

I guess I’m just using this blog post to vent because I’ve been having a lot of worries lately and I’m not sure where to turn to.

If anyone else has been in this kinda situation let me know and how you ended up. Maybe it will end up helping me too. Thanks again and thanks for all the support!

Also a big shoutout to the Blog Complainer for putting my poem on his blog and sharing it with his viewers!

One Day

I’m screaming out into the dark

My hands reaching out between the bars

Begging for me to open my eyes

I rattle and shake the bars

I kick at the door and the chain trying to get out

Trying to break free

I know you’re there

I know you can hear me

Please stop turning away!

We can get through this together

I yell to myself

I know it’s all in my mind

It’s all there and I don’t know why

I try to fight

To push and to pull, anything to lift this veil keeping me here

This cage is too strong and I don’t know how to just open the door

I’m tired from fighting this war

So I sigh deeply and sit back down on the floor

 

Moving

Hey everyone!

I just want to apologize for the long delays in me writing. I’m currently packing and getting ready to move by the end of the month so it’s been really hectic and busy. I’m hoping after I’ve moved that I will have more time to write and really connect with you guys and hopefully even get some videos out!

For now I hope you guys enjoy this short poem!

You can also check out my poetry on Allpoetry.com under the name Angelgreen39

Speaking in Tongues

Your breath is like smoke
Hot and humid, burning up my skin.
All consuming, all around me.
You’re in all my senses, seeping through my pores
We’re speaking without the interruption of sound.
Your tongue is like the lick of a flame
Hot and sensuous on my body
My nerves hit with bolts like lightning
I gasp in a breath.
My mind freezes up
In the heat of the inferno
And I understand you perfectly
As you burn me up in flames.

Maybe We’re Like Johnny and Penn

Hey guys.

That title probably doesn’t make that much sense. I’m watching a movie on Netflix and Johnny and Penn are two characters who start out in a relationship and who do love and care about each other, but they’re not right for each other in that way. So they split up.

There’s a difference between them and how I’m feeling though.

I’m head over heels madly and deeply in love with him. He made me believe in love again. He stole my heart and he’s everything I’ve ever wanted in my life. He is my life.

But when I see people kissing in movies with that spark in their eyes, kissing deeply and lovingly and emotionally, it hurts my heart, because he doesn’t kiss me like that. He doesn’t pull me close to him and tangle his fingers in my hair and kiss me like I’m the only girl he’s ever kissed. I get life isn’t a movie and things aren’t a fairytale. But I just want to feel like his dream girl.

I don’t want to feel like he’s forcing himself to be in love with me when his heart is somewhere else. I think we could be amazing friends. We could have a great time hanging out and playing Pokemon Go and playing COD and watching movies and we could laugh all the time.

But as I think about us moving in together and sharing a room, sharing intimate space and about how he stops talking so much when I talk about things like marriage and the future, I can’t help thinking maybe we should have stayed friends.

Maybe when I started looking at him and feeling my heart skip beats I should have ignored it. When I told him I liked him and he talked about still being obsessed with his ex, maybe I should have let it go there.

I don’t know if I’ll even post this, but I can’t help thinking as I sit here, that maybe the man of my dreams, only sees me as a friend when I see him as home.

Thanks for listening guys.

My Favorite YouTubers!

Hey everyone!

So I noticed that some of my most read and liked posts are about my favorites. Like my favorite songs and quotes and post like that. So today I wanted to talk about a few of my favorite YouTubers!

The first one I want to talk about is Gabbie Hanna. I watch her videos all the time now and one of the things I love most about them is that there’s always something different. Whether she’s trying something new like the keto diet (or should I say, torturing herself), or freaking out about getting a new piercing, there’s always something new and excited and sometimes heartfelt to watch from her. I will admit she can be a little obnoxious sometimes but, then again, aren’t we all?

I also love how relate able she is as someone who also has anxiety and depression I love how I don’t feel so alone in the anxiety and depression when I watch her videos. I definitely recommend watching her videos!

https://www.youtube.com/user/TheGabbieShow

Another YouTuber I’ve been watching lately is a little less heard of but he’s fascinating nonetheless and that’s Sam Johnson.

Sam Johnson is a voice coach who analyzes and reacts to famous singers singing. He analyzes their voices and what they’re doing to achieve certain sounds. He also sings a bit himself.

What I love about Sam’s videos is that he’s very honest and down to earth. He doesn’t judge singers on anything except their singing and voices and he just calls it likes he sees it

His videos are always fun to watch on his channel here:

https://www.youtube.com/user/squirrelbasher

Another YouTuber who I enjoy watching quite a bit is Glam&Gore aka Mikey.

I like her videos because she goes Glam and Gore makeup which nowadays makeup is fairly common online but I like the quirky twist she brings to it which keeps you watching to see what she’s going to do nice and her videos are always great for a laugh.

Her channel is here: https://www.youtube.com/user/GlamAndGoreMakeup

Most of all I like how they make their viewers feel appreciated and how they’re actually doing it for their viewers.

Thanks again for all the support!

A Blogging Experiment

Hey everyone!

So I am currently doing a kind of experiment where I am trying to find the best way to generate traffic and views for my blog.

I am doing this a number of ways but the one I wanted to talk about today is by linking my blog to a bunch of other sites and hoping that by combining all of my different audiences on the other sites, they are all led back here to my blog!

I would like to say up front that this method of generating traffic can be quite confusing.

You need to keep track of all the sites you’re using to promote your blog on and your usernames and passwords for all of them as well.

I recommend using your bookmarks toolbar and bookmarking them all to a specific folder.

In addition to this you should have the device remember your passwords if you can so you don’t need to keep all of your passwords and information written down somewhere.

For this I am using the mainstream sites such as Facebook and Twitter but also some lesser known ones like All Poetry so that I can generate as much as a varied audience as possible.

Another important note is that while I am including the link to my blog on all of the sites, I’m not including links to each site and linking them all together.

There are two main reasons why I’m not linking them all together.

  1. It would take way too long and be difficult to go through each time I make a new site or post and add it to all the other ones I am on and vice versa.
  2. I am promoting my blog and not the other sites so it doesn’t make sense spending all the time and effort to link to all the other sites when my blog is the only one I need people to be able to link back to.

I am expecting most of my views to come from following new people on WordPress but I am hoping by going through and looking at different options I might be able to gain a more varied and bigger following on here.

I would also like to add that even if you’re using this method to try to gain traffic for your blog you should also use the other methods such as keeping your blog up to date and using your tags wisely to get your blog looked at more.

In the past I have found that reading and following blogs that interest you and relate to what you’re writing about is a very effective way to gain followers.

I would also note that while these tips can be used in any blogging, I am using them specifically for the WordPress blogging site.

To make a long story short, I am hoping that having my blog on as many places in the internet as I can, it’s more likely that it will get viewed by more people and generate a steady stream of views and followers.

Thank you all and I will let you know what happens with this experiment including the pros and cons of such!

Guest Writer

Hey everyone!

So I have sort of a strange request today.

I’ve been contemplating lately how to get more traffic and views on my blog and I wanted to ask if any of my wonderful readers would let me write a poem or piece of fiction for their blog and just include a link to my blog as well?

Or if the knew of anyone looking for a guest blogger of sorts?

If any of you know of someone that could help me, please comment below. I would love to help another writer out with content and, in turn, get some views on my blog as well in the hopes to grow it.

Please have a lovely night!

 

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Life and how I'm coping with it (along with some writing)